I'm a Feng Shui consultant and these 3 items promise heartbreak and should never survive a household decluttering session

When decluttering, it's common to consider whether you like items, use them, and whether they still spark joy.

What you might not know, however, is whether any items in your home are setting you up for heartbreak. I'm a Feng Shui consultant, and here I share my tips on how to declutter for good Feng Shui, and avoid letting sadness stay in your home.

From photographs to keepsakes, sometimes it's best to let items go for the sake of your happiness.

3 items you should never keep in your home when decluttering

1. Anything relating to fights or conflict

When you think about it, it makes sense that aggressive images and weaponry would have a negative impact on the subconscious, and therefore be bad energy items, but, nevertheless, many homes feature them.

I’ve worked with many couples who were struggling with their relationship, and in every case, the home included images of warfare and in some cases, a display of knives, swords, or firearms.

Art or photography with battle scenes, aerials of dogfights, a street brawl, or martial arts isn’t exactly romantic, but have you considered they also carry an underlying sense of threat? This energy can increase tension in a home and, without intervention, may lead to the breakup of even the strongest of partnerships, putting these items among the unluckiest items to have in your house.

One lovely lady got in touch in when her 30-year marriage hit the rocks. Looking around the house on our video call, I asked about the large, framed photo of combat troops in Iraq which hung over the fireplace. She was able to pinpoint the date things started to go wrong for them, and it coincided exactly with the arrival of the picture, a legacy gift from an old army buddy.

Fortunately, the husband valued his wife more than the picture, so happiness was easily restored by passing it on to the local Reservist base. Sometimes it’s just as simple as that to rebalance a space and create good Feng Shui in a home.

Bear in mind too, that the passion for swords and medieval armoury generated by cult series like Game of Thrones, may not be the best thing to display in the bedroom of young men, and is sure to create bad bedroom Feng Shui, too.

So, what should you use instead? I always explain that Feng Shui and Interiors Therapy will bring balance and harmony to a home, and as it happens, taking the initiative to create a happier home frequently brings good luck in its wake.

Start by considering what makes you feel good, and take into account other members of the family as you do so. Taking notes from the biophilic design trend, biophilic art, which brings nature scenes into the home, is an uplifting and inoffensive means of adding beauty to a space.

Personally, I choose images that suggest growth, such as trees in spring or a summer scene, rather than anything too wintery, because I love the warmth and positive energy these bring into a space.

Another option is to identify places you would love to visit, and use images of them to try Feng Shui energy mapping, and activate the energy of the Northwest area of your home, which inspires travel and friendship. Or, let fate decide for you with a globe.

You can also find some stunning abstracts which can almost be meditative to look at, or images similar to this Gold Leaf Picture available at Amazon which represent wealth and abundance.

Whatever you choose for your home, bear in mind that life has an uncanny way of mirroring the art and images around us. Take a very close look at the subject matter of everything you display and ask yourself whether this is what you want to experience. If the answer is no, find something you love more.

2. Single women in pictures or figures

I've noticed something interesting in the homes of clients who describe themselves as ‘lonely’ in a relationship, or are single, and not by choice and and that is the number of single images and decorative items on display within the home.

One client, when prompted, counted 76 solo women in her art, on cards, vases, ornaments, and even her mouse mat.

This extends to décor items like any individual best candles, a crystal, an isolated memento of a holiday, and gifts from well-meaning friends. With Feng Shui principles in mind, this single emphasis amplifies the subliminal message that being alone is how it’s meant to be, reinforcing a person's solo status or unintentionally pushing away the energy of a loving partnership.

Give it a go and count the number of solo items in your home. It can be quite an eye-opener.

One of the aspects of Feng Shui I love is using ‘couple energy’ to enhance the feeling of equilibrium and connection with others. Instead of one lamp or cushion, create balance in interior design and have two. Choose art that features pairs, and these don’t need to be human. If cats, penguins, or roses make you smile, then so be it.

One word of guidance though, choose subjects that are looking at one another or obviously united, rather than facing in two different directions, which are classically seen in what's known as a 'divorce house.'

The power of two is appreciated by the eye because as humans we respond well to order in the environment. By focusing on bringing ‘togetherness’ into the home, your intuition will become more open to being connected, and the potential to be part of a duo. Even before that happens, you’ll enjoy more symmetry in your life and that in itself adds to the sense of stability.

Place couple images in the bedroom, just make sure you know where to hang art in a small bedroom first, and also in the Southwest, which represents love and relationships in the Feng Shui energy map.

If you are interested in beginning something new, position a pair of items in the west of your home, which represents a fresh start and opportunities.

3. Storing keepsakes

If, like me, you’re a little sentimental, you are likely to have many souvenirs from a lifetime of special moments. But, you might also be holding on to reminders of past relationships and friendships which ended badly.

Old love letters, photos, gifts, and even wedding dresses long after a divorce are of particular concern when it comes to long-term happiness in a home. Not only do they emphasize the absence of those people, but having them in the home, and worse, touching and re-reading them can instantly reconnect you with the person who hurt you and cause old anguish to resurface.

Revisiting painful times isn’t serving the wellbeing of the amazing person you are now, and what you may not realize is that by retaining the energy of former partners in your home, you inhibit the chances of meeting someone who is truly worthy of your attention. Instead, you’re more likely to date someone who turns out to be very similar to your ex in personality, attitude, or habits and before long, you’re heart is breaking all over again.

So, how do you make your Feng Shui home happy?

Firstly, be brutal. If a relationship ended badly then, the best thing you can do is remove everything connected with them from your home and declutter the sentimental items, including photos, gifts, and all the other knick-knacks you’ve been holding onto.

The interesting thing is that as you do this, you’ll start to recall their less attractive aspects, perhaps the way they spoke to you, or their controlling behaviors. Suddenly, rather than feeling lovelorn and rejected, you see them for who they really are. It’s very liberating on both a practical and psychological level.

Once you’ve dealt with everything connected with people or situations that caused you distress, rather than triggering a minefield of emotions, your remaining precious sentimental items will be a delight to behold. What you’ll come to realize is that when everything you treasure brings happiness rather than pain, life feels a whole lot more auspicious too. When you realize just how much you have to be grateful for, your home and thought processes become a powerful tool for good self-care.

Choose a beautiful storage option, such as storage baskets such as the Homezone Natural Handwoven Seagrass Basket available at Walmart, to keep your really special bits and pieces safe and accessible for whenever you want to indulge in a nostalgic trip down memory lane.

From a Feng Shui perspective, the best place to keep elements from the past is in the East. Put them away in a closet, so they are there when you need them, but tucked out of sight when you don’t.

You deserve to feel happy, healthy, and cherished in your home, and using a combination of Feng Shui and interiors therapy can improve the energy of any space.

Next, learn about the best Feng shui for furniture arrangement, and things to clean according to Feng shui principles.